Nanjing Update
What a week this has been! Monday Elsa was placed in our arms and now I can hardly remember life without her. She is amazing! She is cheerful and content. She eats well, she sleeps well, and she loves all the attention we can give her.
We are in a group with four other families who also received their daughters on Monday. It has been rewarding to get to know them and to share this amazing week with them. Tuesday we went back to the Civil Affairs office and signed papers making the adoption final in the eyes of the Chinese government. Elsa is ours!!!
Wednesday we went to visit the orphanage where Elsa spent the past year. It was gut wrenching. The orphanage is responsible for the care of 700 children. The orphanage is clean. The staff is obviously devoted and caring. Feeding, play, exercise, and education are strictly scheduled and documented. The orphanage is connected to a children’s hospital so medical care is convenient and constant. All of this is true.
If there is one thing I have learned in my life it is that truth is complicated. These things are also true: Elsa is almost fourteen months old and she can barely sit up and only for short periods of time. She can not roll over. She does not crawl. She can not reach or grasp things. She can not bear any weight on her legs. She has self soothing habits. She has sucked her thumbs so much that her thumbs are flat on the tops and her thumbnail is misshapen. She rocks her head back and forth to put herself to sleep so routinely that she has a bald spot on the back of her head. She has scrapes and rashes and a bacterial infection blister on her ear. She has bronchitis. In short, Elsa has had care but she has not had a mother’s love. I am up to the challenge!
After touring the orphanage we stopped at the gate outside the grounds. This is the very spot that Elsa was found at four days old. She was just a four pound purple baby laid down on the ground in the middle of winter. Her mother knew that she would be found very quickly in this spot and that she would get the best care available. I was overwhelmed to be standing there. The pain that filled me may never leave… I took a photo of the gate then someone from our group took a photo of the five of us that looks like we are at a tourist attraction. To me it is a ridiculous photo that perfectly sums up the confusion of this week.
In among all of this we have been doing some sight seeing and having culinary adventures. We have been to The Brocade Museum, The City Wall, The Nanjing Museum, and The Confucian Temple. The Chinese people have been curious but very kind about seeing us with Elsa. It has been so wonderful to be able to share this experience with Al, my dad, and Katherine. My dad has been taking a lot of video tape. I am so grateful to have some of this documented. I used to have a friend who would say “They’re never going to believe this part when they make the movie.”
I am hopeful that I will have better internet connection in Guangzhou so I can post to the Blog directly.Susan
4 Comments:
I can't help the tears thinking of that little 4-day-old peanut out there in the cold! What a wonderful thing that she has so many warm hugs and kisses in her future. Your right, the photo is ridiculous but what else would it be? The contrast between the reality of all of you today and that day only about a year ago is too striking to be anything but ridiculous. What would be an appropriate pose, expression or composition? Anyway, on to more cheerful days and lots and lots of love for that little girl and you all. I am looking forward to some Maya time tonight. Maybe bowling or home movie or whatever she is in the mood for.
Safe travels.
Love you guys!
Cathy
February 22, 2008 at 7:57 AM
Susan,
Your account of Elsa's abandonment perfectly mirrored Rachels. She was found outside the gate of the orphanage at the beginning of February. We took a photo there as well, and were given the chance to tour the orphanage. Gut wrenching is the best word, but I'm sure you'll agree that even that phrase can't fully describe what it feels like to see one. I will never be the same and I'm sure you won't either. Little faces so desperate for a mother and father's love will burn forever in my memories.
How blessed is Elsa and how blessed are you! Your blog has taken me on an emotional journey of memories and counting my blessings. Thanks for sharing!
Love,
Sheila
February 22, 2008 at 11:23 AM
Susan, Susan, Susan....
My heart is full of emotion as I have followed your blog. Thank you SO much for forwarding the link right before you left. I am privileged to have a window into your journey. My heart aches for the abandonment Elsa experienced...and yet the way you guys are incarnating the love of the Father in her life is the "good news" ...the Gospel. Bless you guys, as you soak in so many different experiences, emotions, questions and new beginnings. We send our love to you!!!!
~Erin (for the gang)
February 24, 2008 at 3:00 PM
Susan, I have been unable to write anything before this - all i do is cry and pray! Thank you for allowing me to follow your journey and experience this with you all. You are in my prayers and thoughts - I can't wait to actually be home to hold her and support you in whatever way I can!
I miss you - but I'm celebrating your new family from Denver!
love ya!
liz
February 25, 2008 at 11:50 AM
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